Oscar Review 2015

Was something amiss?  I was so excited for Neil Patrick Harris to host the 87th Academy Awards presentation, however, shortly after his fun opening number, I immediately missed the comedy of Ellen!  There was star power, but where were the legends?  Nicholson, Spielberg, Angelina’s leg, Hopkins, Pharrell’s hat, Hans Solo, Benifer, Streisand? Jennifer Lopez found a way to get invited, again.  There was fashion. Adam Levine’s wife was there, Emma Stone looked gorgeous.  Oprah was there. There were movies, but I think the show missed something.   I’ve got it—Adela Dazeem!

The Red Carpet

Miles Teller and Keleigh Sperry, who? Adrien Brody and Carmen Electra?

Miles Teller, Keleigh Sperry

I thought I had a Bjork sighting, but far too few feathers to be her.

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America Fererra or Jordan Sparks? Go!

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will.i.am. – The ruling on the field, fumble!

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Shaun Robinson a few award shows too late. Yellow was Golden Globes.

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Meryl Streep dressed to impress at her next job interview.

Meryl Streep

Ahhhhhhhhh *RBF* that’s how I feel about you too Scar Jo.

Scarlett Johansson

She finally got rid of that slug of a husband. Just kidding, as long as he is in “Filming Magic Mike” shape.

Jenna Dewan Tatum

Solange Knowles in a straight jacket as to prevent her from going ape shit and beating someone.

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Is Zendaya one of Madonna’s kids or a Jolie-Pitt?

Zendaya

I want Diane Warren’s jacket. I do!

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Who said stars don’t wash their own dishes?

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Her Kentucky Derby hat fell off, but her shoulder caught it.

Gwyneth

Then things got real weird, especially when Travolta got handsy with Scar Jo and called her, SsssssseeI’mNotAHomo.

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I don’t know, I feel like it’s trying to be Laura Ingalls Wilder goes to the Oscars.

ChloeGraceMoretz

J. Lo will have her murdered after the show.

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Faith Hill needs to go back to the blonde bob. Her dress isn’t awful but reminds me of a 1980’s Barbara Mandrell and the Mandrell Sisters dress.

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The Men

David Oyelowo in maroon.

David Oyelowo

Jared Leto in blue.

Jared Leto

Batman in black.

Michael Keaton

Strahan in grey.

MichaelStrahan

NPH in Light Grey.  David Bertka in white and black

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Best Dressed Man

Eddie Redmayne in navy!

Eddie Redmayne

Other hot men

Bradley Cooper

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Common

Common

Chris Pine

Chris Pine

Chris Evans

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Well hello there Uncle Jesse.

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The Couples

HOT

Kelly and Michael

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Justin Theroux and Jen Aniston

Justin Theroux, Jennifer Aniston

Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan Tatum

Channing Tatum, Jenna Dewan Tatum

Kevin Hart and his lady.  He may be short, but he’s packin’ – Whoa!!!

Eniko Parrish, Kevin Hart

Chris Pratt and Anna Feris

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Chrissy Teigan and John Legend

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Behati Prinsloo and Adam Levine

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NOT

Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman

Keith Urban, Nicole Kidman

Faith Hill and Tim McGraw – Too skinny Tim!  Too matronly Faith.

Faith Hill, Tim McGraw

Who the fu** invited him back?

Kelly Preston, John Travolta

Best Dressed

EMMA STONE

Emma Stone

2. Behati Prinsloo

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3. Chrissy Teigan (and Angelina’s leg)

Chrissy Teigen

4. Anna Kendrick

Anna Kendrick

5. Jennifer Aniston

Jennifer Aniston

6. Rosamund Pike

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7. Reese Witherspoon

Reese Witherspoon

8. Cate Blanchet

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9. Kerry Washington

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10. Margot Robbie

Margot Robbie

Honorable Mention – Jennifer Hudson-what a difference 8 years and thousands of dollars and a stylist makes!

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Hated It

Laura Dern – “Full Metal” Strapless

Laura Dern

Marion Cotillard – potato sack couture

Marion Cotillard

Oh shoot, Oprah really cut the budget on Gayle’s dress this year.

Gayle King

Nicole Kidman in Shrinky Dink Chic.

Nicole Kidman

Viola-tion Davis

Viola Davis

It just gets worse.  Have the damn baby already.

Keira Knightley

Nope, not Helena Bonham Carter’s daughter.

Lorelei Linklater

Jessica Chastain usually shows up.  Too much draping.

Jessica Chastain

Felicity, oh Felicity, this is not the remake of a Disney princess movie, it’s the Oscars.

Felicity Jones

The Show

Did anyone else get chills during the opening segment when Anna Kendrick came in and harmonized with NPH? Or did you have a flashback to the 80’s and Rob Lowe’s infamous song and dance with Snow White?

I love that Lupita Nyong’o’s brother is sitting next to Jack Black! Remember him basically boxing his sister out of the famous selfie from last year?

They said there will be more African Americans at this years Oscars than ever. Who thought, “Let’s get Eddie Murphy?”

Documentary Short winner is a cat’s fuzzy ball dream.

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Just when you thought nothing could be worse than the dancing banana in Katie Perry’s Super Bowl Halftime Show, “Everything Is Awesome” happened at the Oscars.

NPH in tighty whiteies? He’s invited back next year!

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Oh look, it’s Patricia Arquette reading from a piece of paper, at a microphone, holding an award…..again.  We all knew you were going to win, including you, memorize, you’re an actress!

Jennifer Hudson’s power number, “Can’t Let Go”, from the tv show SMASH was a little much after the death montage, but he looked stunning!!

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She HATES him!

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“Why are you touching my face?”

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“Why is he still touching my face?”

Idina Menzel, John Travolta

“I hate him.”

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“Benedict Cumberbatch, it’s not only the most awesome name in show business, it’s also the sound you get when you ask John Travolta to announce Ben Affleck.”

Was it me or did Steve Carell have several doppelgängers in the audience? Patricia Arquette’s man, the dude behind John Legend when he won….

The new Ben and Matt…..Common and John.

Bradley Cooper’s mother ain’t got time for that(standing ovation)!

John Legend and Common are hot! That’s all.

Gaga killed it!!  Effortless.  Stunning! Then Maria! Stop it!!!

Oh man, that young man, Graham Moore, wow how personal and inspirational. And yes, thank you Oprah! And then Uncle Jesse standing and clapping with a proud look. Tears. “Stay weird. Stay different.”

John Travolta is still touching Idena Menzel’s face backstage.

The Academy agreed with me, Boyhood was Boring. As. Hell.

Feeling bad for Michael, but excited for Eddie(so genuinely excited and surprised!!) and Julianne(finally! deserving!) and Birdman.  I love NPH, but not his best effort tonight.  I guess I’ll leave it at this because she makes everything better.

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And the Winners of the 2015 Academy Awards

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